What do you do when your life looks perfect, but you are silently falling apart? Dr. Margaret Rutherford offers answers and hope in today's episode, where she discusses her book Perfectly Hidden Depression.
DR. MARGARET RUTHERFORD
Dr. Margaret Rutherford, PhD, is a clinical psychologist in private practice with more than twenty-five years of experience treating individuals and couples for depression, anxiety, and relationship issues. She also offers her compassionate and commonsense therapeutic style to the general public through her popular blog and podcasts, with the goal of decreasing the stigma around psychological treatment. Her podcasts and shows on perfectly hidden depression have reached thousands, and today she is sharing it with YOU!
PERFECTLY HIDDEN DEPRESSION
When I first heard about perfectly hidden depression, I knew I had to speak with Dr. Margaret Rutherford. I have witnessed people I adore most in my life, suffer behind closed doors but present to the world as if everything was okay. To me, this was so odd, and I never fully understand how someone could be depressed yet appear happy – until this powerful conversation.
On today's episode of The Courageously.u podcast, Dr. Margaret Rutherford describes a syndrome whose primary trait is perfectionism, fueled by shame and self-criticism. She helps us understand how someone can present as the perfect friend or co-worker, highly successful, engaged—and seemingly happy—while struggling with wounds that have never been acknowledged or seen for what they are.
If you're ready to learn all about perfectly hidden depression, click that play button, and tune in to Episode 6 to hear all about it.
SOME QUESTIONS I ASK:
- What is perfectly hidden depression and who is effected by it? (3:30)
- What causes perfectly hidden depression? (7:55)
- How does perfectly hidden depression differ from classic depression? (12:30)
- What's the difference between narcissism and perfectly hidden depression? (25:20)
- What does perfectly hidden depression look like when no one is looking? (27:29)
- Do you feel that people with perfectly hidden depression have disassociated? (33:04)
- What advice would you give to someone who identifies as being a perfectly hidden depressed person (36:08)
- What is the connection between perfectionism, depression, and suicide? (39:56)
- Why do people feel they have to show up perfectly on social media? (42:50)
- What does courage look like to you? (50:04)
IN THIS EPISODE, YOU WILL LEARN:
- How Dr. Margaret Rutherford went from being a professional singer to a clinical psychologist (1:23)
- How perfectionism and suicide are linked (7:21)
- How people emotionally survived their situations by coming up with a childhood strategy (8:19)
- What perfectly hidden depression looks like (10:15)
- The major characteristics of perfectly hidden depression (12:40)
- What the opposite of depression is (21:00)
- The things people with perfectly hidden depression don't want you to know (23:00)
- The first step in healing perfectly hidden depression (30:00)
- 5 stages of healing (36:15)
- What socially prescribed perfectionism is (41:00)
- Advice from Dr. Margaret Rutherford herself on how to live with perfectly hidden depression (47:15)
- Plus so much more…
CONNECT WITH DR. MARGARET RUTHERFORD:
ALSO MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
P.S. If you, or someone you know, is having suicidal thoughts, please access help. You matter, your life matters, and help is available. Call the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at 1-800-273-8255.